As always, feedback (positive and negative… so long as it is constructive) is greatly encouraged.

The fight had only just begun and Christian already knew he was in trouble. Taking on one opponent while trying to avoid the other wasn’t going to work, and splitting his efforts between the two was going to get him killed quickly. Problem was, both creatures were incredibly fast and no matter which he took on first the other would be open for an attack. So far he had been lucky that the Mechanoid had stayed relatively stationary however that feeling was somewhat damped by the fact it was firing a new kind of projectile.

He gripped his sword and reached once again for the gun holstered only to discover it wasn't there. After a moment scanning the courtyard his caught a glint of the sun shinning of the steel barrel. It had landed near the armored demon when the first explosion had caught Christian off guard. His ability with Wind spells wasn't nearly good enough for such pin point accuracy which meant he would have to go head to head with the creature to retrieve the weapon.

Committing himself to the task Christian began sprinting at the demon, sword flared out behind him. The spot he had been standing again erupted as another projectile found a mark. The shockwave of the blast propelled Christian forward much faster. This time he was prepared and using the same Wind spell he had earlier used to deflect the demons attack, allowed himself to slam into the creature full force. It briefly knocked the breath out of him but the impact was enough to cause the creature to take a small step back. Taking advantage of the rare occasion of having the upper hand Christian quickly began casting spells. Each one pulled a stone from the surrounding wall and hurled it at the demon.

Impact after impact caused the creature to stagger backwards. Suddenly the beast bent down, bowing it’s head, and grabbed the floor with its hand. Using it’s free hand it swung the huge axe over it’s head impacting with brutal force just a couple feet away from where Christian stood. The force of the impact caused Christian to stumble a little, breaking his concentration. Free of the repeated impacts the demon stood and charged, swinging it’s axe in the direction of the one that had caused him pain.

Christian dropped flat as the blade hissed over his head. He felt his right hand brush against something metal. He turned his head and saw his gun lying there. He quickly retrieved it and holstered it as he prepared to leap out of the way of the incoming axe once again. When he saw the demon shift its aim, trying to anticipate his next move, he twisted around and shoved the sword into the gap in the armor just under the creatures right arm. The abrupt action caused his elbow to flex slightly in the wrong direction causing his incredible pain but stopped his movement. He chanted a small spell under his breath and withdrew the sword, leaving behind the metal sheath that had been bonded the the blade.

He dropped to his knees, the sword clattering to the stones. The demon roared it's displeasure at being violated. Christian took a deep breath and again muttered under his breath. Placing his injured left arm gingerly against his chest he swung his right arm behind him and began chanting yet again. After a second he swung his arm quickly around in the direction of the demon standing in front of him. The Wind spell he had cast caused a burst of wind to begin buffeting the creature, gaining in strength, forcing it inch by inch away from him. Christian closed his eyes and concentrated on the spell, knowing there was every chance the Mechanoid could finish him.

The creature raised its axe and both arms over its head, preparing to the the battle with a single swing. The action shifted its center of gravity just enough that the hurricane force winds were able to lift and fling the beast across the courtyard. The creature slammed into the stone wall, causing the metal sheath embedded within its chest to shatter into hundreds of tiny pieces. With an inhumane roar and gripping its chest it fell to the stone floor.

Christian finally cancelled the spell. He looked across at the demon slumped on the ground and smiled. The shards wouldn't kill it but it would sure as hell hurt. More importantly it would slow it down, giving him a chance to deal with the demonic automaton.

His attention was again drawn to the sound of grinding gears and slapping metal. He looked around at where the Mechanoid was standing to see that it had once again transformed. This time it's left arm had not one, but seven barrels, gathered together in a circle. It reached over and grabbed a hidden handle with it's right hand and the barrels started spinning. This was another configuration that Christian had never encountered and could only guess what the projectiles that contraption would fire. Whatever they were, he had no intention of sitting still and making such an easy target.

He quickly slide the sword back into the scabbard, drew the gun with his right hand and launched himself off the floor. Originally he started to run to the automatons left side, but shifted direction when the creature began to swing the giant gun in that direction. Christian hoped that it weighted as much as it looked and that it would take a second to alter the direction once it got going. He planted his right foot and suddenly shifted his momentum, with the help of a small Earth spell, in a direction that would take him directly toward the wall on the right side of the mechanical creature.

He drew the gun, checked the clip, and began chanting. He combined an Earth spell and Wind spell and leapt towards the wall. When he landed he began running along the wall as if it were the floor. He swung his arm around and aimed the gun at the head of the Mechanoid and began firing.

The creature had managed to almost fully swing the huge gun around in response to the change in Christians direction, but had not anticipated the change in elevation. He raced along the wall firing at the creature until it’s aim had almost caught up with him. In the split second before the rapidly impacting bullets reached him he leaped off the wall, high into the air and back in the direction of the Mechanoid. He twisted and flipped his body so that when he landed behind the creature he was facing it. Before it had a chance to catch up Christian quickly ejected the spent clip from his gun and jammed another home. He then shoved the weapon into the tubes and wires and metal things that made up the body of the mechanical creature. With a second shove, forcing his hand deeper into the mechanisms he began firing. Each shot caused the creature to shudder and twitch until finally it stopped moving altogether until it finally collapsed into a heap.

He heard the sounds of a deep laugh and turned to see the demon was once again standing. He holstered the now useless gun and again drew his sword.

© 2012, anthony. All rights reserved.

Christian made his way down the stairs, slowly drawing the sword from the scabbard hanging on his left hip. There,across the courtyard, were a pair of Demons he hadn't encountered before but he could tell from the smoke wafting out of the eyes of the creature on the right that it was a fire demon of some kind. Add the fact it was wearing armor and it narrowed it down to two possible species. Both stood somewhere near twelve feet tall and both were partial to steel armor. Neither were very pleasant.

The creature on the left however was something he didn't recognize. The silhouette was completely unfamiliar to him and he had made an effort to learn the forms and shapes of every type of Demon that walked the earth.

Regardless, none were invincible and none were immortal. All could be killed. Eventually. Demons didn't have deep skills in the fighting arts but could hold their own against all but the most skilled swordsman. That however wasn't Christians main concern. His main worry at the moment was the fact they were stronger, in general very fast, and could take a tremendous amount of abuse.

He reached the bottom of the stairs, twisted his body so that he was mostly facing away from the creatures, presenting the smallest possible profile. His left hand extend out in front as his right, still holding the sword extended behind him. He paused, waiting for them to make the first move, and thought about his strategy.

Thinking over everything he knew about the two fire demons he suddenly smiled, closed his eyes and began to quietly chant to himself. Small pools of metal began to form at his feet. Several small rivulets of the metals began making their way up his legs, around his body and across his extended right arm. There they made their way onto his sword where they began to collect on the blade. The metals slowly began to harden and bonding with the steel blade, doubling and tripling it in thickness. The result was a sword that was duller, but many times stronger. Something he knew would need in the battle ahead.

Suddenly the unfamiliar creature took a step forward and extended one of his arms. A sound of grinding gears and banging metal echoed across the courtyard.

It was a sound he had heard once before, a sound that meant bad things were about to happen. It meant the second creature he faced was an mechanical, humanoid like thing, dubbed a Mechanoid, that had been infused with the twisted soul of a demon. It made an already difficult and determined opponent near impossible to stop.

The sounds it had made were those of it transforming one, or both, of it's arms into what the priests called 'portable cannons'. Christian didn't understand the principles behind the weapon the creature was carrying but he knew he didn't want to come into contact with the projectile it fired. It didn't just kill or destroy it's target, it caused it to cease to exist. With an inward sigh he reached across his body with his left hand and grabbed the hilt of the gun in the holster nestled under his right shoulder, grateful that he had the forethought to load the Talon bullets. It might not stop the mechanized beast but they were better than the standard variety. At least these wouldn't just bounce off.

The upside to facing the inhumane creature was, because it no longer possessed a demonic body it was more susceptible to the use of magic. By rule demons weren't immune to the use of magic attacks, but it would take someone far stronger is the arts than he was to face one using magic alone. That was the main reason he had turned to the more martial forms of the practice. Using magic to enhance or strengthen his weapons and as defense measures against other physical attacks.

The demon pulled out a battle axe with a handle almost as long as he was tall and an ax head the size of a small cow. Even though he could not see his face, Christian knew the creature was grinning. It reared it head back, let out a horrific yell and charged.

Knowing that if he stood his ground his chances of lasting more than a few seconds were less than nothing, Christian used a wind spell to propel himself off to the side of the charging beast, careful to keep it between himself and the Mechanoid. Facing one at a time was the only way he was going to survive this. Victory wasn't something he was willing to think about just yet.

With unbelievable speed the demon turned and swung his axe at Christian. With nowhere to go that didn't leave him vulnerable or exposed, he used his newly strengthened sword along with another wind spell designed to cause the air to harden to deflect the blow. Even then the effect was incredible. Christian was driven back several feet and his arms momentarily went numb from the impact.

Using an earth spell he launched himself over the demon and directly at the automaton. He landed and immediately pulled his gun and quickly fired off two shots, aiming at the knee joints. Using the same spell he again launched himself high into the air just as one of the deadly projectiles passed through the space he had occupied. It impacted with the armored demon resulting in a small explosion causing it to become dazed. A situation Christian longed to take advantage of, however the shockwave hit him and flung his across the courtyard. As he tumbled through the air he had just enough presence of mind to pull and throw two steel daggers. He cast a quick spell that caused the daggers to dramatically increase in their speed, flying straight towards the demons head.

Either the demon was slow to recover or Christian had gotten lucky. The creature managed to raise it’s axe in the path of the daggers blocking one. The other flew straight into the creatures right eye.

Christian hit the ground hard and rolled. He slammed into the stone wall just as the bricks above him exploded into a thousand pieces as another of the Mechanoid’s projectiles found a home.

© 2012, anthony. All rights reserved.

“No, that is way past normal” replied Phineas

The cause of their concern was a 6 foot tall ELF. Presently he was brandishing what looked, for all the world, like a toy gun. Only a few minutes ago the ELF Commander Faulkner and Captain Remarkable had left on a mission to rescue the the CEO of the North Pole, one called Santa Prime. A being that wasn’t Santa, but apparently was one of many Santas. A concept that still swirled around in Harley’s head.

Mostly however, he was thinking how he could score presents from all the Santas.

“I really hope that thing just shoots foam darts or something.”, said Phineas interrupting Harley’s thoughts.

“Honestly, I’m just hoping it doesn’t turn us into cartoon characters.”

The ELF solider stood in front of Harley and grinned. Not at all a pleasant type of grin, but more like an I'm going to get you kind of grin. It wasn't a grin Harley was particularly fond of and had every intention of staying very far away from.

Harley leaned toward Phineas and whispered," That's not normal is it?"

"No," Phineas whispered back as he stared at the newcomer, " That is way past normal."

"Who are you?"

The ELF continued grinning.

"In case you didn't hear me; I asked who are you?", Harley repeated.

"Call me Mel if you must."

"Mel?", chimed in Phineas, "What kind of name is Mel for an evil Yule Night terrorist?"

The ELF effected a look of mock indignation. It was eerily similar to the _I'm gonna get you _ grin, only with less menace. There was still plenty of menace.

"You've been talking to Faulkner. I'm not a terrorist. Who am I terrorizing? "

"Um, " said Harley, "It's 'whom' and right now, me."

The ELF grinned again. That was enough for Harley. He turned and dashed across the console heading for the other end of the room where he had stowed some of the gear Faulkner had left them before leaving with the captain to rescue the Santa Prime. He had no idea what any of the stuff did. He didn't remember the instructions Faulkner had given him because he hadn't paid attention, figuring there was no way anyone would find them out here in the Cloud.

He still wasn't sure how Mel found them, much less how he got on board. Come to think of it, he never got a clear answer for how Faulkner had managed it either.

He was going to have to pursue that line of questioning further at a later time. Right now there was a matter of the Evil ELF Mel on board.

Phineas realized where Harley was heading and quickly joined him. They both grabbed the first thing the came to, Phineas getting a large white and red barrel shaped object with what looked like a scope and a trigger. He shrugged, hefted it up to his shoulder (not knowing where else to put it) aimed in the general direction of Mel and pulled the trigger.

Nothing happened. The look on his face would have been priceless, and something Harley would have teased him about for years, had he been paying attention. Instead he was focused on trying to figure out the item he had pulled from the stash.

It was flat, about the size of a decent sized book and slightly thicker. There was a single button on one side and what looked like a removable stick with a second button on the other side. Harley removed the stick and vaguely remember something about not wanting to be near when he pressed the buttons. He quickly pushed the button on the box thing and tossed it in the direction of the Evil ELF Mel.

Now it's interesting to note that Mel hadn't moved. Well, in fact he had moved but only to sit down and watch with merriment the activities of Phineas and Harley. He watched with glee when Phineas failed to correctly fire the CC Launcher. Not that being sprayed with hundreds of candy canes would have done much. True, it would leave a few welts but wouldn't stop him from his goal.

His mood changed however when he realized what Harley had retrieved. A Garland Bomb. Something he most definitely hadn't expected to see on this ship. Apparently Faulkner has been a little more prepared than he has expected.

His face fell as Harley tossed the bomb in his direction.

He turned and ran toward the door at the far end of the room in desperation. His only hope was to out distance the device. A hope that proved ultimately futile as Harley pressed the button on the remote while the bomb was still airborne. It detonated between Mel and the Santa Trap effectively securing him in place against the unit with fluffy, wispy, silver tendrils wrapped around the two. Not what he had planned and it put a serious cramp on his day.

The whooping from the other side of the room didn't help either.

"Nice shot Harley!", shouted Phineas

Harley danced in place.

Mel smiled to himself. He had forgotten he was carrying a . He flicked his right wrist and disappeared. The Garland trapping him falling to the metal floor silently.

Harley stopped dancing.

"No fair!" he shouted.

Mel suddenly appeared behind both Harley and Phineas with a soft popping sound. They both turned to see him pointing a small device at Harley. The device fired and green and red beams hit Harley, turning him ice.

Phineas shouted and threw the CC Launcher at the Evil ELF, “Harley!”

There was a soft popping sound behind Mel. He turned around to find a 6ft tall Dawgerian Shepard dressed in a red coat and pants trimmed in white fur smiling.

The Shepard reached out to the shocked Mel and placed a small snowflake pin on his chest. A soft silvery glow immediately enveloped the renegade ELF member, freezing him in place.

Phineas knelt beside the ice shaped little dawg, calling out the name of his friend.

He didn’t answer.

© 2011, anthony. All rights reserved.

“Don’t be a baby Phin! I’d go but I have to stay behind to operate it.”, Harley paused, “Unless you want to.”

Phineas looked over the controls for the SantaCatcher 5000, his eyes passing over the hundreds of dials and knobs and levers and switches and other things that had to be pushed, poked or flipped and decided that it would be in his best interest not to attempt to operate the device. However that left him with the option of going into the thing and getting zapped to another part of who knew where.

“You have no idea what’s going to happen.”

“I do so! The blender I sent through last week and was fine.”

“Fine?”, Phineas shouted, “It came out in pieces!”

“Well, the fruit I put in it was blended wasn’t it?”

“So let me see if I understand this correctly”, interjected Faulkner, “This device essentially encodes the object at a quantum level, transmits that data and recreates it at the destination. “

Harley just stared at Faulkner with his jaw gaping open, “In a nutshell, yes.”

“Interesting.” Said Faulkner as he walked around the device rubbing his chin and muttering to himself, “This technology could help the Santas tremendously.”

Phineas, in an effort to avoid having everyone forget about his concerns, chimed in, “If I go, who is going to pilot the ship? Tell me that one.”

“I can put it on auto pilot”, replied Captain Remarkable, “It can handle most basic navigation chores. Besides, if we don't make it back it won't matter anyway.”

Phineas glared at the captain and flopped into a chair as he turned to look at Faulkner and Harley, “I don't like it.”

“Honestly, neither do I”, said Faulkner, “I should be going with them.”

“You can’t, I need your help locating the Mantle.“

“Be that as it may Harley, they will need someone with them who knows how to deal with the renegade ELF team.”

“Renegades elves?”, asked Harley as he attempted to raise his bushy eyebrows.

“ELFs, yes. We believe that a renegade faction of the ELF is responsible for stealing the Mantle and kidnapping the Prime.”

“And you think we need someone to help us deal with them?”, asked the Captain. ”We’ve dealt with pirates, I think we can handle them our own.”

“I imagine you can captain, however these aren’t like any pirates you’ve ever faced. These are highly trained agents charged with protecting the world’s most valuable secret.”, retorted Faulkner with a wary smile.

“World’s most valuable secret? Isn’t that a little overboard?”

“Perhaps Captain, but imagine if no little kids got presents on Yule Morning. Without the Santas the Spirit of Christmas, the spirit of giving and kindness wouldn’t exist. How do you think the world would react if they knew the truths?”, replied Faulkner.

Phineas paused for a moment, “Maybe. “

“Maybe?!”, squeaked Harley.

Faulkner watched as a minor squabble broke out between Harley and Phineas. He glanced to the captain who just smiled and shook his head. Apparently this was a usual ocurrance and he was content to let it play out. Faulkner however was in a rush, “We are getting off track. We need to rescue Santa and retrieve the Mantel.”

“Okay how about this Faulkner, you and the captain go after the santa-nappers while Harley and I attempt to locate the Mantle? How does that sound.”

“You’re just afraid of meeting up with the evil elves.”, said Harley, teasing Phineas again.

“Evil Elves?”

“Well, they are evil and they are ELFs”, said Harley, “Evil sounds better than ’renegade’. It has a nicer ring to it”

“I’m not afraid”, said Phineas with air quotes, “The captain was a member of the Knights of Orange, that makes him a better fighter than I am, and since Faulkner is the only one who knows how to deal with the bad guys it makes sense. Right Faulkner?”

“What you say does make sense.”

“How am I supposed to locate this Mantle thing without Faulkner? Stick a candy cane in the tracker? Maybe a fruitcake?”

“You were able to program it to track Santa Prime correct?” asked Faulkner

“Yes, but he’s not an inanimate object.”

“Try to locate Santa Paws. He’s tracking the Mantle. You can transport or teleport or whatever it is you do to him.”

Harley thought for a moment. It wasn’t a bad idea, and if things were as Faulkner said, it would be a better plan. However he had a feeling things weren’t going to go exactly as planned. They never seemed to. Realizing that was what made the adventures on the Daedalus so exciting, he made his decision, smiled and said, “Okay then.”

—

Faulkner returned carrying a couples of large bags which he placed against the back wall, “I’m leaving these for you two just in case. They are non-lethal and to be used for defense only. And Harley, no hacking.”

Harley let his face droop. He still planned to take a hard look at the contents, but wasn’t planning to let anyone know.

Faulkner quickly gave instructions on how to use each device as the Captain returned from his cabin. He was dressed in an old black uniform from his days in the Knights of Orange.

“Start calibrating the machine to locate Max while we finish the final prep.”

“Wait, how are you going to find Santa if the machine is programmed to look for Paws?” asked Harley.

“Oh, I forgot to tell you. As a Commander of the ELF I have access to a teleport.”, Faulkner said as he fastened his harness. He glanced over to the Captain who nodded to signal he was ready.

“We’ll return as soon as we get the Prime. Locate that Mantle.”

Phineas grinned knowing that the expression on Harley’s face meant he was supremely jealous of the teleport technology.

Faulkner grinned, flicked his left wrist and both he and the captain vanished.

“I so want that”, said Harley with barely contained excitement.

Phineas kept grinning.

© 2011, anthony. All rights reserved.

"More importantly, how did you get on this ship?”, Captain Remarkable stepped forward, addressing the newcomer directly.

"I took the sleigh.”

“You took the what?” Harley perked up.

“That doesn’t answer my question, we are in the Cloud for cripes sake."

“Think of me as a hitchhiker Captain.”

“Funny, I don’t remember pulling over.” Phineas asked, walking into the room,  “What I miss?”

“I don’t have time to go into details at the moment.  Suffice to say I work for the Santas.  We can find anyone anywhere, I was sent to seek you out and ask for your help., he smiled, “To answer your question Harley, my name is Faulkner.”

“Why are you here?

"Someone stole the Santa Mantle and kidnapped Santa Prime.

"Someone stole the what and kidnapped the who?”

Faulkner sighed heavily and wearily.  This was the conversation he really wasn't  looking forward to having for many reasons.  Not the least of which being time. Or the lack of it.

It was always the way in situations like this.  The people involved need to know what has happening and why and how they were supposed to help, but the was always a time limit.  

"There isn't time to explain everything really, but I suppose I have no choice.  I'll compress it as much as I can for now and will be glad to answer any questions you may have when possible. I suggest we all take a seat."

Once they were all seated Faulkner paced around the room.  Everyone twisted or swiveled in their respective chairs to follow him as he told a tale that kept each of them enraptured.  Everyone except the Captain.  He assumed this was all an elaborate scheme to take over his ship.

“Let me start by saying that everything you know about the person called Santa Claus isn’t exactly true.”

Harleys ears drooped.

“Easy Harl.  Let me explain.  As I said, what you know isn’t exactly true.  Or at rather it’s not the entire truth.  The reality has become corrupted over the years, but since it actually serves to help hide the truth of who Santa really is, we began to encourage the tales and stories.

The one you call ‘Santa’ we call ‘Santa Prime’.  He is in charge of the other Santas and manages the production and distribution of the toys and gifts.”

“Wait, so Santa is a CEO?”

“Technically speaking, yes.  However he is also much more that that.  He’s also the guardian of the ‘Spirit of Christmas’”

“What’s christmas?”  

“Christmas, Harley, is what you call Yule Night.  It’s known as different things in different places.  It’s original name in fact isn’t Christmas but something lost to time.  

Anyway, getting back to my story.  The ‘Spirit of Christmas’ that Prime guards is what we call the Santa Mantle.  It’s what lets him distribute joy and cheer throughout the year and what allows the other Santas to travel and deliver so many gifts. “

“I told you he had cool technology!” exclaimed Harley.

“Stop interrupting Harley,” Faulkner smiled, “It’s not technology. It’s magic. A very old, very special kind of magic.  

The Mantle was stolen yesterday, presumably when Santa Prime was kidnapped.  We must find it and get it back and the Prime back before Christmas Night… I mean Yule Night.

Right now Maxamillian, Santa Paws is tracking the ones that took the Mantle.  Horus, also know as Santa Claws, that’s C L A W S, is following up on a lead to locate Prime.  

We need your help Harley.”

“My help?  Why me?”

“The short answer is, there is a provision that should something happen to the Santas we were to contact you.  There were some that argued it was too early, that you weren't ready but I won the debate.  Or rather I ignored them and came after you anyway.  I can’t really say more than that right now.”

“You’re asking us to take a lot on faith Faulkner” the Captain said as he stood up.

“Yes I know.  And I’m sorry.  I’ve told you all I can for now and we are short of time.  Yule night is in 2 days.”

“How many Santas are there?” asked Harley cheerfully.

“Quite a few.  In addition to the ones I already mentioned there is Cynderklas, Father Yule, and Saint Kristopher to name a few.

"So where do you come into all this?" asked Phineas

"I'm a Commander in the E.L.F., and was assigned to protection of the Prime.  I'm responsible for him and it's my job to get him back."

"Wait, “said Harley, "You're an elf?"

"No, I'm a member of the E.L.F., that stands for Extremeis Liberitus Forte.  It's essentially a police force assigned to guard and protect the Santas."

"I don't understand.  You're wearing green, but aren't you suppose to be short, and have pointy ears?"

“I’m not an elf Harley.”

“Denial is the first sign."

Faulkner sighed, “I assume you've heard of the MCU?”

Everyone nodded

"We are the MCU for the North Pole.”

“North pole?  We don't have a north pole. We don’t even have a north”

"Every planet has a north Phineas.  Besides, it's not a place per se, that's actually the code name of the Candy Cane Factory, the place where all the gifts are manufactured.  It's a heavily guarded secret and no, I won't take you to visit Harley.”

“Won’t you get in trouble?”, Harley asked in earnest.

“Probably.  I intend to resign once this is over anyway.  In all the time since the ELF has been established no one has ever lost a Santa.  I'm the first. “

“What can we do to help”, volunteered Harley to the unsmiling faces of Phineas and the Captain.

"I honestly don't know.  I was hoping you knew of a way to find a rescue the Prime.  If you don't I …”

Harley grinned.

“Harley,” began the Captain, “Am I correct in assuming that the words "I have a plan" are heading with unwarrented enthusiasm in the direction of this conversation?

“Yes sir, however, I don't think anyone’s going to like it.”

“When do we ever?”, Phineas smiled.

© 2011, anthony. All rights reserved.

“What were you trying to do?”

“I was trying to capture Santa!”

Phineas did a double take at Harley. Being fourteen inches tall and twenty seven inches long might be average for a Dawg of his breed but it didn't’ allow much room for a grin the size of the one he was currently wearing.

“Why.”

“Because I want my pressies.”

“What does that have to do with capturing Santa,” asked Phineas as he sat on a stool and looked around for the plate of cookies he had brought down.

“You have to capture Santa so he will give you presents. That’s how it works.” Harley, realizing something wasn’t right cocked his head and looked at Phineas who was eating a cookie, “Isn’t it?”

“Um, no. You don’t have to capture Santa for him to give you presents. He brings them to all the good little boys and girls."

"And dawgs," Phineas quickly added, "He leaves them for you under the tree. No capturing involved.”

“Are you sure?” Harley asked narrowing his eyes and staring at the metal construct designed to hold Santa.

“Yes I’m sure you nut job.”

Harley looked crestfallen.

“Well he must have some really cool technology,” he announced cheering up and dancing around the room.

“I’m sorry?”

“How else would he be able to travel around the entire planet in a single night delivering toys to all the good little dawgs everywhere?”

Harley babbled as he dashed around the room twisting dials and flipping switches. The Santa Trap was fairly new and had never been tested until today, but it was based on a previous design so he was confident this would work.

Granted the previous design had blown up rather fantastically. He cast glances over at the large metal object sitting in the middle of the room. It easily stood six feet tall, was shaped vaguely like a bullet and had any number of wires and hoses coming out and going in.

To this day Phineas was unable to figure out how a Dawg as small as Harley was able to build something so large. It didn’t seem physically possible since he was only twice his current height even when he stood on his hind legs.

Apparently Harley ignored the laws of physical possibilities. At least it the the only explanation he could come up with.

“He must to have a quantum deluxe time dilator or flux capacitor.”

“A what or a what?”

“Or maybe he’s dimensionally transcendental.”

“What the heck does that mean?”

Harley stopped fiddling with the screen he was adjusting and looked over at Phineas, “No idea but it sounds cool,” He said as he smiled.

They both jumped when the banging started. It had been a quiet knocking at first, and thinking back Phineas realized it had been there a while, he had assumed it was simply part of the machinery. The sudden increase in volume and intensity dispelled that illusion.

“When you guys are done chatting would someone please let me out of here?"

Harley flinched.

Phineas simply stared.

“Who exactly did you catch?”

“I… I’m not sure.”

“You said this was designed to catch Santa.”

“Well yes, but that doesn’t mean someone else can’t accidentally get caught.”

“Someone else did get caught,” came the voice from the metal container.

Phineas crept over to where Harley sat on the desk, “Dude, you caught the captain.”

Harley’s eyes widened. He stood, jumped off the desk and began to trot quickly towards the door.

“Where are you going, are you actually running away?”

“I prefer to call it a strategic retreat.”

Phineas walked over the the capsule and began trying to pry open the capsule doors, “Get over here and help me get the captain out of here.”

“Are you insane? He’s going to kill you if you let him out.”

“No he won’t, he knows who is responsible for this. You’re the one he’s going to kill.”

“Me?!”

“Who else on this ship comes up with these kinds of schemes.”

“Seriously, you’re just going to throw me under the bus like that?”

“You two are aware of the fact I can hear you right?” came the muffled voice again.

Harley blanched. Which for a black and brown haired Dawg was an impressive feat.

Harley trotted back over this his chair and worked his way back onto the table. After a moments hesitation he flipped a switch and pressed a couple buttons causing the metal monstrosity to shiver. As it the door opened as the ships captain slowly stepped out.

“Heh. Sorry captain.”

“Harley, what. Are. You. Doing?” asked the rather annoyed Captain Remarkable.

Harley froze, his ears erect and swiveling back and form, searching, “I hear something!”

Phineas and the Captain turned to look towards the door.

Outside there was a sound. A faint, quiet little sound that echoed through out the entire ship. A sound that slowly grew slightly louder. It sound, at first, like a hard rain when it fell against the hull of the ship. As it grew it changed. Now it began to sound like bells. Hundreds of small metal bells. The kind one might find on a sleigh.

Phineas turned to look at the captain, a look of disbelief on his face,”Santa?”

Harley grinned, “Santa!”

© 2011, anthony. All rights reserved.

This is another long missive. Weighing in about around 1300 words. Feel free to skip if you like, but I think some will find it interesting and helpful maybe.

I knew going in I would never make 50k. I wanted to. I really did, and I had every intention of making it to that goal. However with everything going on in my life I knew it was going to be impossible.

I didn't think I'd only end up with 13K however. I figured I'd hit 30 or so. 20 at the very least. But 13? Easy.

Not so much. And it was my fault. Yes, I was sick for the first 2 weeks and felt the after effects of that illness until… well, I still do. But I still could have written more.

What it boiled down to was a failure on the most basic levels:

Poor planning Poor execution Severe lack of discipline.

I thought I knew my story. After all, it's been siting in my head and on various notes for almost 7 years. I had started writing parts of it out previously in an attempt to maybe film it and post the episodes online. However costs became prohibitive (as in I had no money for supplies or even a camera), I had mapped out 12 episodes, knew the characters, and had a plot worked out (actually, I have the 'plot' worked out for the first 5 seasons / books / story arcs). So I knew what was going on and how to proceed right? Wrong.

I used the original screen scripts as research since I knew I would have to alter and expand a good bit of it seeing as how all my visual gags and funnies now had to be handled differently. I figured no big deal, I'll just put in more description and switch up the dialogue a bit.

I decided to write it and turn it into a weekly serial. So I broke each 'episode' into 4 'scenes', and figured 1K words per scene. That had me at 48K without even trying. I figured I knew several of the scenes very well so I could write those first then focus on the ones that I didn't know quite so well. This was going to be cake!

What an idiot.

I can see now where I failed. Where I assumed too much in some cases, and not enough in others. Places where I blindly blundered in thinking I knew the space so well the words would just flow.

Problem was, they didn't flow. I didn't know everything as well as I thought I did. On top of that I tried to be a real writer. By that I mean I tried to be serious. Tried to write like I though I was suppose to, not how I do naturally.

I play with words and phrases. I don't put things in the proper gramatical place all the time (sometimes even by accident ;) I have fun. I wasn't doing that here.

I'm not serious by nature. If you're reading this you already know that (probably). You should already know about some of the images I post or the snippets I write. At the very least you will probably know about the I'm on a horse! line I post in response to just about anything :)

Of the stories about the cats taking over my mind / body and plotting to take over the world.

If you've read any of my writings, especially the Tribe Detective Agency or the previous postings about Skies Above you know that I'm not.

I can be. Other stories reflect that. And future stories will be more serious in nature. But for this story I didn't want to be. For christs sake, on of the main characters is a talking dog that is the chief engineer for the ship and invents things in his spare time. It takes place on a planet created my powerful beings (called Exceptions) that get drunk on a regular basis and play with reality. It has a Magical Cr-- (oh wait, you aren't supposed to know about that yet). How the hell can I ever take a story like that seriously! I imagine you could write that without the gags and jokes and smart assery. But I also imagine it would suck. Which it did.

Okay, off the tangent. The point is, was, is… I basically set myself up for failure. And I let that get me down. Way down. Way, way down. To the point where when my wife made an innocent comment about 'magic' I took it to mean something it didn't and got majorly depressed. I let that happen. Worst part is I could have stopped it, or better yet prevented it from happening in the first place.

So, to that end I have a new plan going forward. I have an ongoing challenge with +Katherine Dalton we dubbed the 4x4x4 in which I write 40K words a month for 4 months on 4 different stories. November was to be Skies Above (now called Skyline thanks to +Greg Christopher :), December was going to be God Shaper, January was 5th Source and February hadn't been decided yet. Which in a way is good because I'm going to shift everything back a month.

Plus, I've come up with what I think is a good plan for me. 2000 words a day.

Now before you all freak out and tell me that if I can't make the 1600 for NaNo I can't make the 2000 for myself let me finish. When I'm free writing, just putting words down I average about 1600 words in 48 minutes.

When I'm not forcing it.

So, if I plan out when I'm writing better (map out in further detail) I think I can make it. I can always find an hour to write, especially if I stay up after the wife goes to bed. In a thirty day month that will give me 60K words.

Since I work better when things are fresh in my mind, so after I hit my goal each day, if I spend a few minutes mapping out the next couple scenes (each scene is about a thousand words remember) I should be able to just sit down the next day and write.

That covers the Planning and Execution issues.

I've learned that when I'm upset or not feeling good it's near impossible for me to write. I'm hoping that having the next scenes mapped out will help with the 'sit and stare' problem. If not I plan to get up from my chair and go play Fruit Ninja Kinect or something like it. Or go for a walk. Or workout in some way. Get my head away from whatever I was thinking and get physical (I suspect Fruit Ninja will be a good distraction. Maybe too good… :) Then go back and try again.

The Discipline will be harder. Wanting it isn't enough. I just have to work at it and do it every day. However, I have given myself permission that if it just isn't happening or I just don't have the time (doing other things) it's okay. That should help with the I'm failing, I'm no good at this. I just suck feeling that tend to dominate me at times like that.

So losing NaNo this year might have been a good thing. It helped me see a few things that I hadn't seen before.

All in all, it's been a pretty good weekend :)

(I worked out some other things too, but you don't need to hear about those :)

© 2011, anthony. All rights reserved.

I recently had the honor of being a beta reader for Emlyn Chand's Farsighted, and I can honestly say I was glad i read it. The central storyline revolves around Alex, a teenager who has been blind since birth.

I was originally concerned I would like the book since the premise is that he develops the ability to 'see' the future. Talk about cliche, the blind guy can see?

However Emlyn pulled it off wonderfully. She took it in a direction that I didn't expect and took full advantage of the fact that Alex is blind. He was able to 'see' the future the same way he is able to 'see' now; with his other senses. And her descriptions of the scenes Alex experiences are very well done. Once I got a handle on what was happening I was able to experience them along with Alex, they were that clear (to me)

And don't let the fact that it takes a bit to grab hold of the story, it's a good thing. I don't know if Emlyn did in intentionally but you make the journey and experience things, including the confusion and the "What the hell just happened!" moments along with Alex.

If you get the chance, definitely take the time to read this. If you like paranormal/mystical stories you would love this. If your like me, and tend to avoid them don't. It's worth it.

And if you know me at all you know I like, scratch that… LOVE well done twisty endings. I won't tell you what happens but you won't see the end coming :)

I wonder how many more times I can squeeze 'experience' into this review…

Blog Tour Notes

THE CASH PRIZES: Guess what? You could win a $100 Amazon gift card as part of this special blog tour. That’s right! Just leave a comment below saying something about the post you just read, and you’ll be entered into the raffle. I could win $100 too! Please help by voting for my blog in the traffic-breaker poll. To cast your vote, visit the official Farsighted blog tour page and scroll all the way to the bottom. Thank you for your help with that.

THE GIVEAWAYS: Win 1 of 10 autographed copies of Farsighted before its paperback release by entering the giveaway on GoodReads. Perhaps you’d like an autographed postcard from the author; you can request one on her site.

THE AUTHOR: Emlyn Chand has always loved to hear and tell stories, having emerged from the womb with a fountain pen grasped firmly in her left hand (true story). When she’s not writing, she runs a large book club in Ann Arbor and is the president of author PR firm, Novel Publicity. Emlyn loves to connect with readers and is available throughout the social media interweb. Visit www.emlynchand.com for more info. Don’t forget to say “hi” to her sun conure Ducky!

MORE FUN: There's more fun below. Watch the live action Farsighted book trailer and take the quiz to find out which character is most like you!

© 2011, anthony. All rights reserved.

I'm a huge fan of YA, and probably spend most of my reading time in this area. As such I'd a tab embarrassed at how few of these I've already read. I'm really going to try to read as many of these as I can.

Bolded books are the ones I've read.

1. Alex Finn - Beastly
2. Alice Sebold - The Lovely Bones
3. Ally Carter - Callagher Girls (1, 2, 3, 4)
4. Ally Condie - Matched
5. Alyson Noel - The Immortals (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
6. Anastasia Hopcus - Shadow Hills
7. Angie Sage - Septimus Heap (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
8. Ann Brashares - The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants (1, 2, 3, 4)
9. Anna Godbersen - Luxe (1, 2, 3, 4)
10. Anthony Horowitz - Alex Rider (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)
11. Aprilynne Pike - Wings (1, 2, 3)
12. Becca Fitzpatrick - Hush, Hush (1, 2)
13. Brandon Mull - Fablehaven (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
14. Brian Selznick - The Invention of Hugo Cabret
15. Cassandra Clare - The Mortal Instruments (1, 2, 3, 4)
16. Carrie Jones - Need (1, 2, 3)
17. Carrie Ryan - The Forest of Hands and Teeth (1, 2, 3, 4)
18. Christopher Paolini - Inheritance (1, 2, 3, 4)
19. Cinda Williams Chima - The Heir Chronicles (1, 2, 3)
20. Colleen Houck - Tigers Saga (1, 2)
21. Cornelia Funke - Inkheart (1, 2, 3)
22. Ellen Hopkins - Impulse
23. Eoin Colfer - Artemis Fowl (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)
24. Faraaz Kazi - Truly, Madly, Deeply
25. Frank Beddor - The Looking Glass Wars (1, 2, 3)
26. Gabrielle Zevin - Elsewhere
27. Gail Carson Levine - Fairest
28. Holly Black - Tithe (1, 2, 3)
29. J.K. Rowling - Harry Potter (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)
30. James Dashner - The Maze Runner (1, 2)
31. James Patterson - Maximum Ride (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)
32. Jay Asher - Thirteen Reasons Why
33. Jeanne DuPrau - Books of Ember (1, 2, 3, 4)
34. Jeff Kinney - Diary of a Wimpy Kid (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
35. John Boyne - The Boy in the Striped Pajamas
36. John Green - An Abundance of Katherines
37. John Green - Looking for Alaska
38. John Green - Papper Towns
39. Jonathan Stroud - Bartimaeus (1, 2, 3, 4)
40. Kami Garcia & Margaret Stohl - Caster Chronicles (1, 2)
41. Kelley Armstrong - Darkest Powers (1, 2, 3)
42. Kristin Cashore - The Seven Kingdoms (1, 2)
43. Lauren Kate - Fallen (1, 2, 3)
44. Lemony Snicket - Series of Unfortunate Events (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13)
45. Libba Bray - Gemma Doyle (1, 2, 3)
46. Lisa McMann - Dream Catcher (1, 2, 3)
47. Louise Rennison - Confessions of Georgia Nicolson (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10)
48. M.T. Anderson - Feed
49. Maggie Stiefvater - The Wolves of Mercy Falls (1, 2, 3)
50. Margaret Peterson Haddix - Shadow Children (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)
51. Maria V. Snyder - Study (1, 2, 3)
52. Markus Zusak - The Book Thief
53. Markus Zusak - I am the Messenger
54. Mark Haddon - The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time
55. Mary Ting - Crossroads
56. Maureen Johnson - Little Blue Envelope (1, 2)
57. Meg Cabot - All-American Girl (1, 2)
58. Meg Cabot - The Mediator (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
59. Meg Cabot - The Princess Diaries (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10)
60. Meg Rosoff - How I live now
61. Megan McCafferty - Jessica Darling (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
62. Megan Whalen Turner - The Queen’s Thief (1, 2, 3, 4)
63. Melina Marchetta - On the Jellicoe Road
64. Melissa de la Cruz - Blue Bloods (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
65. Melissa Marr - Wicked Lovely (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
66. Michael Grant - Gone (1, 2, 3, 4)
67. Nancy Farmer - The House of the Scorpion
68. Neal Shusterman - Unwind
69. Neil Gaiman - Coraline
70. Neil Gaiman - Stardust
71. Neil Gaiman - The Graveyard Book
72. P.C. Cast & Kristin Cast - House of Night (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 )
73. Philip Pullman - His Dark Materials (1, 2, 3)
74. Rachel Caine - The Morganville Vampires (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10)
75. Rachel Cohn & David Levithan - Nick & Norah's Infinite Playlist
76. Richelle Mead - Vampire Academy (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
77. Rick Riordan - Percy Jackson and the Olympians (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
78. Rom LcO'Feer - Somewhere carnal over 40 winks
79. S.L. Naeole - Grace (1, 2, 3, 4)
80. Sabrina Bryan & Julia DeVillers - Princess of Gossip
81. Sarah Dessen - Along for the Ride
82. Sarah Dessen - Lock and Key
83. Sarah Dessen - The Truth about Forever
84. Sara Shepard - Pretty Little Liars (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)
85. Scott Westerfeld - Leviathan (1, 2)
86. Scott Westerfeld - Uglies (1, 2, 3)
87. Shannon Hale - Books of a Thousand Days
88. Shannon Hale - Princess Academy
89. Shannon Hale - The Books of Bayern (1, 2, 3, 4)
90. Sherman Alexie & Ellen Forney - The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian
91. Simone Elkeles - Perfect Chemistry (1, 2, 3)
92. Stephanie Meyer - The Host
93. Stephanie Meyer - Twilight Saga (1, 2, 3, 4)
94. Sue Monk Kidd - The Secret Life of Bees
95. Susan Beth Pfeffer - Last Survivors (1, 2, 3)
96. Suzanne Collins - Hunger Games (1, 2, 3)
97. Suzanne Collins - Underland Chronicles (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
98. Terry Pratchett - Tiffany Aching (1, 2, 3, 4)
99. Tonya Hurley - Ghost Girl (1, 2, 3)
100. Wendelin Van Draanen - Flipped

© 2011, anthony. All rights reserved.

This weeks prompt:

Remote control of insects by neural implants

© 2011, anthony. All rights reserved.